A Programmers’s wife tells him to go to the store and bring back a loaf of bread and If they have eggs, bring back a dozen.
The husband comes home and says here’s your dozen loaves of bread honey.
The wife says " Why the hell did you buy a dozen loaves of bread?!!?"
The husband says "Because they had eggs!!!"
It feels good to be running from the devil
Another breath and I'm up another level
It feels good to be up above the clouds
It feels good for the first time in a long time now
hahahah. too good.
"You can't buy happiness… but you can buy weed, which is pretty close."
LMMFAO. .. I think that may be us guys in general…
Abduction means the end for me, a million years of misery…
Hey, an algorythm is an algorhythm. Follow the instructions…
Jesus and Satan have an argument as to who is the better programmer. This goes on for a few hours until they come to an agreement to hold a contest with God as the judge. They set themselves before their computers and begin. They type furiously, lines of code streaming up the screen, for several hours straight.
Seconds before the end of the competition, a bolt of lightning strikes, taking out the electricity. Moments later, the power is restored, and God announces that the contest is over. He asks Satan to show his work. Visibly upset, Satan cries and says, “I have nothing. I lost it all when the power went out.â€
“Very well,†says God, “let us see if Jesus has fared any better.â€
Jesus presses a key, and the screen comes to life in vivid display, the voices of an angelic choir pour forth from the speakers.
Satan is astonished. He stutters, “B-b-but how?! I lost everything, yet Jesus’ program is intact! How did he do it?â€
God chuckles, “Everybody knows… Jesus saves.â€
"You can't buy happiness… but you can buy weed, which is pretty close."
A programmer’s wife is having a baby. The doctor immediately hands the newborn to the dad.
His wife asks impatiently: "So, is it a boy or a girl" ?
The programmer replies: "yes".
"You can't buy happiness… but you can buy weed, which is pretty close."
Jesus and Satan have an argument as to who is the better programmer. This goes on for a few hours until they come to an agreement to hold a contest with God as the judge. They set themselves before their computers and begin. They type furiously, lines of code streaming up the screen, for several hours straight.
Seconds before the end of the competition, a bolt of lightning strikes, taking out the electricity. Moments later, the power is restored, and God announces that the contest is over. He asks Satan to show his work. Visibly upset, Satan cries and says, “I have nothing. I lost it all when the power went out.â€
“Very well,†says God, “let us see if Jesus has fared any better.â€
Jesus presses a key, and the screen comes to life in vivid display, the voices of an angelic choir pour forth from the speakers.
Satan is astonished. He stutters, “B-b-but how?! I lost everything, yet Jesus’ program is intact! How did he do it?â€
God chuckles, “Everybody knows… Jesus saves.â€
Awesome. Always save. Always backup.
Sail and grow
Deep inside
The brave align
Green we stay
-Boss Keloid Lung Valley